Being different does not always mean being flawed

Women love bad guys. Really they do. Which means that the bad guys are far more successful with women than the rest of us.That seems to make no sense at all. Why would women choose to get involved with men who’re so self-centred and unfaithful?

Because bad is sexy. Spontaneous. Passionate and exciting. Bad guys dominate the space around them. They make fearless eye contact with everyone. They don’t gush or show their feelings. They drink. And prefer women who drink. Because women who drink tend to enjoy sex more. They have a great sense of humour – and the better a man’s jokes, the more women he’s likely to sleep with! They’re charming. And know what women want.

So even though they’re dangerous, controlling and arrogant, they definitely get more of the action. It’s as if women can’t resist them. Masculine, adventurous and fearless. Strong, confident and resilient. Always looking like they’re spoiling for a fight. Full of attitude. Secretive. Mysterious. So you never know what to expect. It’s difficult getting their attention, so winning one makes a girl feel special. And of course she dreams of changing him...The movies make them seem irresistible.

Brad Pitt in Fight Club. Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean or Will Smith in Bad Boys. But they can have a very real dark side. Many are highly impulsive. But that doesn’t seem to stop them attracting plenty of short-term partners. Many have obsessive personalities. Yet obsessive men seem particularly successful at finding long-term mates. It’s not just men. Impulsive women also tend to have more short term partners.

Sensitive and anxious women tend to be particularly successful at starting long-term relationships. And have more children than average. Nowadays we tend to see extreme personalities like these as illnesses. But since they seem to lead to such interesting love lives, maybe we should think of them as sexual strategies.

Like women are generally more sensitive than men. So more sensitive can seem more feminine. And a bad guy’s risky and impulsive behaviour also makes him look brave, self-reliant, successful — and desirable. Obsessive males can also look attractively reliable and cautious.

And they tend to earn lots of money! Which implies a better future for their children. Impulsive people’s lifestyles also mean that they meet more potential partners, while sensitive women tend to put a higher value on long term relationships. So traits like these are not actually the disadvantage that they seem. Because they also result in more partners.

And also more children. Which means that being different doesn’t necessarily mean being flawed. So don’t automatically label someone as “abnormal” just because they have an unusual personality! They’re tough to live with though. So think twice before starting a relationship with one...And if you’re a nice, well-rounded person but can’t seem to hit it off with the opposite sex? Then maybe you need to show a little more of your dark side!