My husband wants to marry a second wife

My husband of three years wants to marry his side-chick as his second wife. He says it is because he does not want the daughter he had with her to be raised by another man. PHOTO | FILE

Hi Brenda, 

My husband of three years wants to marry his side-chick as his second wife.

He says it is because he does not want the daughter he had with her to be raised by another man.

We have two children of our own and he expects me to embrace this woman and her child even though he has no clear plan of how he will proceed.

What do I do? 

Your husband seems to have made up his mind to marry this other woman, there isn’t much you can do about that.

One thing you can do is ask yourself whether or not you want to be part of a polygamous marriage.

Remember that it is a permanent decision. Do not agree to polygamy hoping that your husband will change his mind along the way or that the other woman will get frustrated and leave.

If it’s not a commitment you can make, it’s time to re-evaluate your relationship. 

Whatever you do, do not give your children as a reason for staying in an unhappy marriage.

That is not heroic. It is selfish.