Dealing with grief after bereavement

Distressed young woman. For most of us, bereavement will be the most distressing experience we will ever face. PHOTO | FILE

What you need to know:

  • Grief is a natural process, but it can be devastating.
  • Grief is what we feel when somebody we are close to dies.

There are many falsehoods people believe about grief and loss. Some of them have been highlighted below:

Ignore it, it will soon go away

Real healing only comes as we learn to confront the source of your grief and actively looking for ways to deal with it.

Be strong, don’t allow emotions to control you

Feelings of sadness, sorrow, pain, hurt or even lonely are common with grief. Showing these emotions is not a sign of weakness and inability to lead yourself.

Moving on means you aren’t hurting

Grieving can take a long time, however, learning to constantly appreciate the good helps keep those great memories alive. But, life has to move on.

I suggest that as you acknowledge your pain, be willing to accept that the grief you feel can trigger unexpected emotions that you may need to manage.

Each person’s grieving process is unique to them. I also suggest that you look for a moment to get a one-on-one with a counsellor for support. Watching your emotions and staying close to a supportive system will help you avoid chances of falling into depression.

-By Philip Kitoto

Further information

Grief is a natural process, but it can be devastating. Most people will cope with help and support from family and friends.

For most of us, bereavement will be the most distressing experience we will ever face. Grief is what we feel when somebody we are close to dies. Everyone experiences grief differently and there is no 'normal' or 'right' way to grieve.

Source: Befrienders Kenya http://www.befrienderskenya.org/bereavement.html

For those who need additional specialist help, Befrienders Kenya offers free confidential support for adults and children, and this can be by telephone, email or face-to-face.