When he got there, he found his colleagues tucking into roast chicken and other tastier things than njahi and could not help pitying himself.

This incident happened last year December, but this unlucky man tells me that his colleagues still get a good laugh whenever this incident comes up, which is often.

Since we’re talking weddings, not every smartly dressed man or woman you see in these functions is an invitee. The fact is that you could be seated next to a conman.

A friend learnt this the hard way during her wedding, about four years ago. Like many couples are doing nowadays, in their invitation card, they requested guests to gift them “envelopes” (money) rather than gifts, a request that makes sense – think about it, what are you supposed to do with a roomful of cheap water glasses?

On the wedding day, a young man dressed in a smart suit and bow-tie, (I remember because I handed him my envelope) walked around the tables collecting the money.

He looked every inch the part, plus a wide smile and a murmured, “Thank you, God bless you.” Such good manners.

We were therefore all surprised when much later, towards the end of the function, the MC introduced the young woman that had been given the responsibility of collecting the money.

By the time the ruse was discovered, the conman was long gone. Luckily, he  had the courage to steal from the bride’s side of the tent only.

Moral of the story? Introduce the person you have trusted with the collecting right at the start of the ceremony, or request guests to hand over their envelopes to the couple.


[email protected]; Twitter: @cnjerius. The writer is the Nation features editor



Hilarious article! It happened to me once. I was fresh from campus and a friend invited me for her birthday dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant. Everybody knows that in birthdays, there is free beer and food. I invited my boyfriend. At the end we were given Sh2,000 bill and I only had Sh100. I perspired. My furious boyfriend fortunately swiped his card to save situation.


You had us in stitches too.  What your relative suffered was a mix of mis-communication, clash of cultures and  love of freebies.


The article cracked me up. Reminds me of a story I heard of a girl who was invited by her boyfriend and she tagged along  her girlfriends, only for the bill to be brought and the boyfriend circles out his bill. It is good to find a way to ask “are you going to pay for it?”


If I had shared my story with someone, I would have said this story was about me. I had a similar experience but thank God I had some cash.


For your relative I feel sorry but at least they enjoyed lunch.


Freebies are motivators which makes us to buy more (even useless items we do not need), vote for politicians we would have otherwise rejected and makes us dependent on them rather than working hard.


I had the same experience a few years ago. I bumped onto a friend and we went for lunch. I ate and when separate bills were brought I regretted meeting him.


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