In Summary
  • Accept the alimony for your child but do not take more from him than you need to.
  • Start your life without him. If you don't do what you say you're going to do, then you'll still be here writing to me next year. If you want to go...go!
  • Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? Send your questions to lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com

Hi Brenda,

Please tell me how I can forget about this man and just move on. We have been dating for four years but I never knew he was married with two children. I only found out after I got a child of my own. He’s promised to buy land and build me a house but I still feel lost and helpless. This is difficult and stressful for me. Please help.

Hi,

The thing is, when you get tired, you will leave. If you are still there, it means something inside you is still hanging on, still hoping, still wishing that he will somehow change.

It has been four years. He isn't changing, and neither are you. If you really can't stand him, leave the relationship. Say no to the house.

Accept the alimony for your child but do not take more from him than you need to. Start your life without him. If you don't do what you say you're going to do, then you'll still be here writing to me next year. If you want to go...go!

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Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? Send your questions to lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com