JUST BRENDA: I’m married to a stingy man

Dear Brenda,

I got married to the meanest man on earth who would rather eat githeri or sukuma wiki every day than spend his money on meat.

He has a good job with a six figure salary but our children go to school in worn out uniforms. That’s why I stole his money (he keeps wads of cash in the house) one day and bought some basic necessities.

This earned me a huge slap from him but I fought back with words and he apologised. Mark you, we have been married for four years so this is not something new, it just gets worse with time.

The last time he bought himself a new shirt was years ago.

There are a lot of problems with this problem, so I'll start with the one that jumps out the most to me – the fact that he slapped you.

You mentioned it in passing, but are you ok that he is generous with his slaps and not with his money?

Why does he treat you like that, and why do you put up with it? If it isn't a deal breaker for you, then that's well and good, but if it is, you need to address that before you address his stinginess.

Then, this thing of going to school with worn out uniforms is ridiculous.

You may just have to take money out of your own pocket to do something about that situation, because he clearly doesn't care enough.

If it isn't necessary, or avoidable, then it really isn't necessary, if he can afford it.

Find someone who can talk sense into him – or get the headmaster on your side to write a missive to all parents about maintenance of a clean and kempt uniform...

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