In Summary
  • Are you a HR agency or his rich uncle? Please.
  • Cut all those men off and find out where the normal ones interested in self-sufficiency hang out, please.
  • Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? Send your questions to lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com

Hi Brenda,

I have been dating for a while now. I have my own job and car but most men I have been meeting are slay kings who want me to pick up the bill. I don’t usually act or talk like I want to do that but somehow they just sit when the bill comes and I am usually too embarrassed to start asking them to pay. One even asked me to find him a job, imagine. Am I throwing some wrong signals Brenda or what is the problem with men these days?

Slay kings, huh. I wonder if men think the same thing about us! The first thing you need to shed, before you shed these supposed slay kings, is your embarrassment.

At the beginning of the date, be like, we're splitting, right? If he was interested in paying, he'll say no, it's fine, I'll get it. If he says, oh, you're not paying? Say NO.

The only time you should be paying for a bill for a first date is if you are the one who asked him on it. Find him a job?

Are you a HR agency or his rich uncle? Please. Cut all those men off and find out where the normal ones interested in self-sufficiency hang out, please.

Lead with your intention at the beginning of the date, to save you an extra expense at the end.

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Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? Send your questions to lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com