JUST BRENDA: Will office romance ruin me?

I am scared of making this an official relationship because I have always feared office relationships. PHOTO | FILE | NATION MEDIA GROUP

What you need to know:

  • I am scared that if it doesn’t work I will be the one to get a bad reputation.
  • And if it works, people will still talk about me.
  • Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: [email protected]

Hi Brenda,

I am a bit confused. I like this guy in the office and I am not sure what to do.

We do lunches sometimes and talk and we have visited each other, though I was clear I was not ready for intimacy just yet.

I believe he likes me because he treats me well. But I am scared of making this an official relationship because I have always feared office relationships.

I am scared that if it doesn’t work I will be the one to get a bad reputation, as most men get away with such relationships but rarely do the women. And if it works, people will still talk about me.

Please advise about workplace relationships.

 

Hi,

This is a case of a work husband gone extra!

Sometimes office romances do turn into something more permanent, but it takes a lot of care to make sure they don't go completely left, doesn't it?

Particularly if you're to the point of going over to visit each other and discussing intimacy.

I think you were right for holding off on the intimacy. I wish I knew how long this has been going on for.

First, what is your company policy, HR-wise, about inter-office relationships? Think about the greater repercussions of this relationship, if it happens. If you lose your job over it, it might not be worth it if you've only been seeing each other for a few months.

Also, relationships don't necessarily have to be consummated in that way to be real. It's entirely possible to get to know each other better, and grow in this, before anything has to be sealed, so to speak. It comes down to what you really want, balanced against what you'll lose to get it. Which is more important?

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Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: [email protected]