JUST BRENDA: My joblessness makes it impossible to date

Hi Brenda,

I’m currently jobless and living with my parents and it is making me have very low self esteem. Dating is a problem because I often don’t have fare to go to town. How can I solve this problem please?

Hi,

Even as you want to go on dates, I think perhaps this would be a good time to work on yourself more.

Of course relaxing and having fun is important, but you need to spend more energy on self development as well, and the self esteem you talked about.

These are more pressing issues at the moment. I would suggest that after applying for internships and in the interim period for waiting for something to come through, start creating jobs for yourself because the government certainly will not be doing it for you.

Ask your parents if they can pay you to do small errands that they don't want to do themselves, as a way of getting some pocket money to grow or invest, or use or leisure.

Extend this service to your neighbours and other family as well. These services could be taking documents into town, picking up laundry, etc.

Eventually, when you get asked on dates, you'll be in town for them anyway, and perhaps even be able to pay for your own cup of coffee as well.

It can be a difficult time trying to get on your feet, so I would also suggest you talk to your parents about what they think would be the best way forward. Good luck.