JUST BRENDA: My sister gossiped about me

I was really stressed about why she can’t just tell me these things but instead goes to backbite me with someone else. PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP

What you need to know:

  • Sometimes someone just needs to talk about it without solving the issue.
  • Let her have her outlet.
  • In the meantime, take note of the things she was venting about and weight them – do you think they are valid?
  • Is there anything you are willing to do to change the things she wants changed? If so, do so.

Hi,

I accidentally saw the content of my sister's Facebook Messenger and it broke my heart. She was seriously talking trash about me. How do I confront her about the issue? I was really stressed about why she can’t just tell me these things but instead goes to backbite me with someone else.

 

Well, that's quite sad, but she is still your sister. She still needs a place to vent. Maybe she is trash talking because she doesn't know how to tell you certain things, or maybe she doesn't want to.

Sometimes someone just needs to talk about it without solving the issue. Let her have her outlet. In the meantime, take note of the things she was venting about and weight them – do you think they are valid? Is there anything you are willing to do to change the things she wants changed? If so, do so.

If not, wait until she comes directly to you with her problems, because I assure you she will not take it kindly if you confront her after having invaded her privacy.

Plus, in a free and private space, she's probably talking more trash than she actually feels, emboldened by the fact that she thinks you are never going to see it.

Try and start opening up to her about your own problems, both with her and other people, so you can open up channels of communication and perhaps make a safe space where she can air her grievances as well.

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