When life gets hard, get better and work at it

“Life is hard. After all, it kills you.” Katherine Hepburn 

The thing about life is that, while it can be rewarding and beautiful, it can also be hard and unfair. But there are people who make a good life seem so easy. They just “get it”.

They become so good at life, and we follow them on social media and online, wondering what their secret is. The secret is, well, not really a secret in today’s information laden age if we are willing to become students of life.

There is a way to make life work, and the world’s greatest teachers have left behind loads of wisdom for the keen observer of life. Here are a few:

You build a great life the way you build a house. You start with a desire, create a plan, find the money, and start with what you have.

You start with a solid foundation, which while it will remain unseen, will determine if your life will hold or disintegrate. Your foundation is made up of your values, spirituality, upbringing and training.

American rapper Ice Cube puts it thus, “What I learned from architectural drafting is that everything has to have a plan to work. You just can’t wing it. I can’t get all the materials I need for a house and just start building. Whether it’s a career, family, life — you have to plan it out.”

You build a great life the way Rome was built. Slowly. Surely. Intentionally. Brick by brick. A city that is as beautiful and grand as Rome is, had many architects and builders.

It is remarkable that it has withstood the test of time and that it still stands. Beautiful. Defiant. In our microwave, instant tea, and overnight millionaires age, patience is not a virtue. But anything worth doing, anything we expect to outlive us, takes time. And the commitment to showing up everyday, building, brick by brick.

Your health, career, finances will need the same determination, everyday, for a lifetime. Emperor Augustus boasted, “I found Rome a city of bricks and left it a city of marble.”

You build a great life by building great relationships. With friends, family, neighbours, colleagues, children and spouses. The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. Become good at relating. Get counselling to become a better parent or partner. Forgive. Give. Love. Laugh.

And choose wisely who comes into your circle. Michelle Obama said, “Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down. And trust your instincts. Good relationships feel good.

They feel right. They don’t hurt.” If you do have a good relationship, treasure it. Work against taking it or each other for granted.

You build a great life by stretching, growing and learning. Most of the important things about life, they do not teach you in school. You learn through experience.

Yours and that of others. You learn from the wisdom of others. You will encounter hardships every once in a while. The truly great refuse to give in.

They learn a new skill, a new way to be or a new way to think so they can meet their challenges head-on. Struggling in life, health, relationships or money? Buy the book. Take the course. Sit at the feet of experts. Jim Rohn wrote: “Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better.

Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenge, wish for more wisdom. The major value in life is not what you get. The major value in life is what you become.

Success is not to be pursued, it is to be attracted by the person you become.”

You build a great life by making a difference. While making money can be a worthwhile  goal, a great life is about doing something good.

Something beautiful. Serving humanity.

We do not remember the great legends of our time by the wealth they accumulated but rather by how they transformed our lives.

Steve Jobs asked: “What is Apple, after all? Apple is about people who think ‘outside the box,’ people who want to use computers to help them change the world, to help them create things that make a difference, and not just to get a job done.”

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