Man who lost wife to bone cancer takes cruise in her memory

That first cruise paved the way for many more and the latest figure stands at ten at least. The destinations we have covered are the Caribbean, Mediterranean, Black Sea, Alaska, South America and Norwegian fiords.

What you need to know:

  • “My wife and I took this cruise last year to celebrate our golden wedding anniversary and standing on this very spot we repeated our vows right in front of the Son of God.”
  • “Six months after we returned home, she started complaining of general body-ache. When they X-rayed her skeleton, all the bones in her body seemed to be affected.”
  • “Yes, multiple myeloma is a generalised bone cancer.” I agreed. “She was given chemotherapy but within two months, she was gone,” he continued.

We took our first cruise in May 1983. It was organised by me to fulfil a promise, I made to Marie when we got married. We had our honeymoon on a shoe-string budget because I was on a modest salary as a trainee surgeon; so was Marie as a junior theatre sister. What we received in hand after deduction of tax, social security and national health service was enough to live comfortably.

But we could not save much and after paying for the civil marriage at Caxton Hall, lunch reception at the Overseas League, we were left with very little to pay for our honeymoon and took a package holiday to Majorca, the largest of the Balearic Islands, off the coast of Spain.

It had recently upgraded its infrastructure, hotels and beaches and thus become a top tourist destination for Europeans holiday makers yearning for the sun. To make up for this poor man’s holiday, I said to Marie in one of my rash moments, a frequent occurrence in the life of a honeymoon couple. “Hopefully our finances will improve when I am a fully fledged surgeon in private practice, and if so, I will take you on a cruise on the QE2 to celebrate our silver wedding anniversary.”

I wondered if Marie would remember my commitment after 25 years, not realising that women have special memory to store such promises. Both our children, obviously coached by their mum, reminded me full two years before the occasion, so I had no escape!

Another reason for avoiding a cruise was the misconception we carried about it; it was meant for rich old folks and we did not qualify under either heading! My concern, in addition, was what I would do the whole day on the sea but our very first cruise on the Cunard ship, Queen Elizabeth, which was a five day trans-Atlantic voyage, without any stops dispelled my fears and put me right on that score. There was a full day programme daily and it was so intense and varied that Marie and I had to part some days to participate in what particularly interested each one of us.

In addition, there were lectures on interesting topics, yoga classes, film shows of classics and recent releases, an adequately stocked library, where there were daily news bulletins obtained on the satellite, a fulltime casino and fantastic musical or comedy shows and cabarets every evening, which could easily match Broadway and the West End.

There were fashion shows with beautiful models paraded in a seductive catwalk in front of a constantly cheering audience. There was also a swimming pool with a gym, sauna, steam bath and Jacuzzi all facing the sea. So there was no time to feel bored! That first cruise paved the way for many more and the latest figure stands at ten at least. The destinations we have covered are the Caribbean, Mediterranean, Black Sea, Alaska, South America and Norwegian fiords.

Amongst the ships we have sailed include all three Queens, Elizabeth, Mary and Victoria, P & O, Princess, Balmoral, one of the three ships belonging to Fred Olsen family and Azamara club class both in accommodation and service. Some of these cruises were undertaken in the company of our daughter and son. We took one river cruise on the Danube, which started in Budapest and touched many spots in Eastern Europe, which belonged to the former communist regimes.

It is one special character we met on our South American cruise, who has traces of Surgeon’s Diary in him that I want to write about today. As usual, we booked an ocean facing cabin and could see the rising sun from our window most days. We watched the setting sun and the splash of colours it caused in the sky as we walked the full circumference on the open top deck, which made a full kilometre, according to the signboard on the deck.

As we strolled under the open sky from the dining room, we watched the milky moonlight shimmering on the undulating water. We made full use of the amenities on board as we watched our co-passengers shedding their stress of keeping schedules and meeting targets. It seemed that we were living on another planet!

It was in this relaxed atmosphere that one day, I met Germaine from Bogota, Columbia by the swimming pool. Marie was attending a lecture on acupuncture and I was alone looking for an easy chair by the swimming pool, when I met him and he readily introduced himself. I put him at 75 years of age. It was a sunny day and the place was crowded. Germain was dozing on a poolside bed, wearing a straw hat and sun glasses. Next to him was an empty bed and just out of courtesy, I asked him, as he stirred. “Anybody here?” That is when he extended his hand and told me his name and where he was from.

“Yes,” he replied. “My wife.” So saying, he brought out a ladies’ bathing suit from his belongings, placed it on the bed and added. “There you are, it’s officially occupied now.” I found another seat and occupied it, reading ‘How to Kill a Mocking Bird’ by Harper Lee, a Pulitzer Prize winner novelist. I had tried to read the book before but couldn’t get into it, because it is written as seen by a little girl and in very American English.

Now, having seen the film, earlier on the cruise and highly impressed by the story of a white woman, allegedly raped by a black man, in Deep South in the nineteen thirties, who is defended by a white lawyer, Atticus Finch. His role in the film was played by my favourite Hollywood star, Gregory Peck, who won the Oscar for it. After seeing the film I decided to have one more go at the book and luckily it was available in the ship’s library. After reading for about an hour, I vacated my seat because Marie and I had agreed to meet after the lecture.

It did not escape my notice that the bed next to Germain was still vacant. This happened a few times to Marie and me in the dining room and the theatre in which the shows were staged; every time the seat remained unoccupied till the end and the wife remained an illusion. The cruise ended in Rio, from where we were due to fly home but the ship arrived there early in the morning and we were not due to fly till the evening.

So the cruise company had laid on a full day programme for us to visit Corvocado with its huge statue of Christ blessing the city below, cable- cars to get us to Sugar Loaf Mountain from where we could see the spectacular city and finally CopaCabana Beach where we saw Brazilian children playing football, their national sport on improvised pitches. It was on Corvocado Mountain that eventually the mystery of the phantom wife was unravelled.

As soon as the tourist bus stopped, Germain walked briskly to the statue of Christ as if he was on familiar ground and knelt in front of it like many others with one difference; he was crying. Marie noticed that there was no empty seat next to him as he sat there praying for a long time. At Marie’s beckoning, I stood on one side of him as she did on his other side to comfort him when he came out of what looked like trance. When he saw us standing on each side of him, he decided to disclose to us what it was all about.

“I owe an apology for being so rude to you whenever you wanted a seat next to me. Let me explain now.” As we found a seat for us all to sit, he added. “My wife and I took this cruise last year to celebrate our golden wedding anniversary and standing on this very spot we repeated our vows right in front of the Son of God. We took a tour in every port the ship anchored. During our stop in Rio, we visited this spot and took a cable-car to Sugar Loaf Mountain. We drank Margaritas galore by the swimming pool and had the best holiday of our life.”

With a long sigh, Germaine continued. “Six months after we returned home, she started complaining of general body-ache. Our doctor, unsure of the diagnosis, gave her pain-killers which helped for a while until she broke her arm after a trivial injury and X-rays showed a pathological fracture, which I understand now is a fracture in a diseased bone which in her case was multiple myeloma, a type of bone cancer. When they X-rayed her skeleton, all the bones in her body seemed to be affected.”

“Yes, multiple myeloma is a generalised bone cancer.” I agreed. “She was given chemotherapy but within two months, she was gone,” he continued. “Multiple myeloma is a bad cancer, “I said.” And has very poor prognosis. Not one of my patients lived more than a few months.”

“I was devastated but she was very brave.” Germaine went on. “Two days before she passed on, she got out of bed showing intense pain on her face from the deposits in her skeleton, some bones fractured and either nailed or plated hugged me and said. “Don’t grieve for me. Thank God that He granted us fifty years of bliss. In a few months, when our next wedding anniversary is due, take the same cruise again and remember, I will be with you.”